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Expert Q&A

	By Adolph Brown Psychologist

I walked in on my 7-year-old daughter in the bathroom fondling herself. What is the best way to approach this?

It gives most parents major concern when their young people are caught fondling their genitals. However, unlike a child caught picking his or her nose, when a child is seen fondling oneself, parents often feel that this is not normal behavior. Quite the contrary. Most children enjoy genital exploration. This behavior becomes more evident as children begin toileting behaviors whereby the genitals become exposed "at last." Some children are believed to engage in such behavior for feelings of pleasure or self-comfort.

It is important to remember the end result of this "startling behavior" for many parents is an attitude of healthy sexuality in the young person. Young people will need to be told as well as taught that healthy sexuality is not "bad." Remember to keep lines of communication open cloaked with respect and values.

I recommend that when parents are exposed to this type of exploration in their young people, that they not overreact, encourage another activity, distract him or her by introducing a novel activity and remain as calm as possible. Be sure to assess your child regarding fondling behavior, i.e. urinary tract or yeast infections, over-stimulation, boredom, etc.

As parents, we must be mindful that part of our responsibilities surround teaching our children about healthy sexuality. With mutual respect and open communication, parents can offer effective guidance during times like these as well as those to come."

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