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Rob's Diary Entries Diary Navigation: Choose A Diary Entry -------------------- Latest Entry: 11/15/00 -------------------- 11/7/00 11/1/00 10/25/00 10/10/00 10/4/00 9/25/00 9/19/00 9/13/00 9/6/00 8/29/00 8/23/00 8/16/00 8/8/00 8/7/00 8/1/00 7/26/00 7/19/00 7/12/00 7/5/00 6/26/00 6/15/00 6/8/00 5/25/00 5/22/00 -------------------- Rob's Introduction

July 5, 2000

The Fourth of July was a family day, and we spent it cleaning. Cleaning is not our idea of fun, so it's not like we took a vote and that's what we decided to do. No, but we were way behind, and serious cleaning efforts on Jenny's part Saturday had made a dent, but only a dent, in the mounting chaos. So we cleaned from early morning until abut 4:30 p.m., and then we took Rowan outside to blow bubbles. It was good family time, and the stoop should be pretty clean now that all that bubble solution has been dumped on it.

We did throw a small barbecue for the guys in the theatre company -- they were rehearsing all day and needed a break, so after we finished cleaning we grilled and played hackey-sack (well, we tried ... ) while Rowan helped everybody relax and have fun. And she even went to bed with no trouble at all.

Jenny got a great surprise on the Fourth -- her bosses gave her the rest of the week off! Well, suddenly we found ourselves in a golden situation: Rowan was expected at day care, Jenny had no work, and I had no work. Of course, I needed to be looking for a job, but for today that went out the window.

We took Rowan to her daycare and picked up a news paper. We sat in a small café and read the paper while we drank coffee and savored the silence. Then we went to a movie! Now, some of you parents out there may be following the standard advice and are getting out for a date a few nights a month. We don't get out that often, so a movie is a very big deal.

We went to see The Perfect Storm, because we wanted to experience the spectacle on a big screen. That's our criteria for picking the rare and few movies we actually see at the theater: will it be less exciting on a videotape? As far as The Perfect Storm goes: it looked cool, but is that what passes for a good script these days? It was overtly manipulative. I admit that I was powerless to keep from tearing up at points, but I maintain that the whole thing was the literary equivalent of having someone sit across from me and repeat, "dead puppies, abandoned children, custody battle ... " Still, being able to sit through the film without distraction and then to walk back home casually while discussing it was a luxury we don't often enjoy. We had fun when we got home too.

We enjoyed our day, and we didn't really miss Rowan, but when it was time to pick her up, we were more than ready to have her back. Unfortunately, I had to go to rehearsal tonight. Now let me be clear: I enjoy rehearsals, and I enjoy working with my good friends in the Billy Goat Experiment Theatre. But I don't enjoy anything as much as being with my family, and I know that Rowan does not like it when I'm not home in the evenings. She gets angry, Jenny says, and I guess I don't blame her.

I have had the luxury of being home with Rowan a great deal in her first twenty months of life, and she has grown to expect a lot of attention and time from me. Theatre can't compete, and it breaks my heart to have to leave Jenny and Rowan alone in the evenings, particularly if I haven't seen them all day. Today I got to spend a lot of good time with Jenny, but now I wanted some time with my baby girl -- with all of us together -- and instead I had to go to rehearsal.

When I got home, Rowan was asleep, and I have to admit that I was glad to hear her wake up and start to cry. It meant I could steal a little extra time with her. When I went into her room, she was standing up in her crib, and when the door opened she started saying, "Mama, Mama, Mama ... " She was barely awake, and as I picked her up I said, "No Sugar Bear, it's Papa."

She settled her head drowsily on my shoulder for a second and then perked back up. She turned to face me and gave me a bright, grateful "Hi!" Then she settled back down on my shoulder, wrapping her arms around my neck and giving me a toothy, open-mouthed kiss on the cheek. It took about six songs and two or three separate attempts before I simply settled her in and let her fuss for a bit. But for that that greeting, I think I would have been willing to sit up all night with Rowan.

Oh, we don't simply dump Rowan in the crib and let her cry to exhaustion, but we have found that there are times when she has simply decided not to sleep. The only thing that works on these occasions is to soothe her as far as possible, and then kiss her good night and leave. She cries for a bit, but she settles down and sleeps fairly quickly. When we're lucky. When we're not, the cycle of soothing, good-night, and crying, can repeat itself four of five times. This time, once was enough.

p.s. I have included some pics which we just got back. Here is Rowan and me licking Father's Day cake batter, and a casual family portrait.