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Off to Work We Go?
Two Dads Sound Off About Going Back to Work After Baby
By Donna Smith
Flinn used to hate thinking like that. "It made me feel guilty," he says. "It's like that song 'The Cat in the Cradle.' I soon began to hate the song, but now I don't. I used to feel trapped because someone has to bring in the money, and we want one of us home with the kids. Since that traditionally falls into the mom's role, I guess that left me to go out to work. I don't feel that way now."
After his second child arrived, things changed. Flinn decided to be a stay-at-home dad. "Now I look and see my 16-month-old playing and running around, then suddenly he trips over the air and falls," says Flinn. "He gets up and then runs crying, not to Mommy, but to me! I choke back the tears as I listen to him get mad at whatever imaginary thing he thinks made him fall. Then I give him a hug and send him back to play. It's times like these that I know I'm doing the right thing. I say that every day. I figure if you can't, then are you really doing the right thing?"
Flinn feels parents need to be more available to their kids. "Now I look at the news and see the same things going on in families all around the world, much of it due to lack of proper parental presence in the home," he says. "It caused me to really think about my family. You see, I used to 
work full time, plus overtime. Sometime I would go to work before my son got up and come home after he went to bed. It bothered me when I would notice how close my wife and son were – they were like best friends. However, what really was bothering me was how out of place I felt. They were like a team, and I was left on the sidelines. It made me realize I wasn't having much of an impact on the type of man my son would turn out to be."
Want to see more?
- Making Change Work: Husbands and Wives in Stay-At-Home-Dad Families
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? The Pros and Cons of Being a Stay-at-home Dad
- That's My Job: A Journey to Become a Stay-at-Home Dad
- Join the discussion on our Family.com community!
- Guilt and the Stay-at-Home Dad: Lessons on Letting Go and Accepting the Now
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