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Paternity Leave
Why It's Important to Consider Taking Paternity Leave
By Katherine Bontrager
When Troy Scheer had his second child, he joined his wife at home for a full two weeks of paid leave to revel in the joys of his new son and care for the couple's 3-year-old daughter. Just a decade ago this would have been unheard of, but Scheer and many dads like him are now embarking on new territory – paternity leave.
According to the National Fatherhood Initiative, while most companies offer six weeks of paid maternity leave, only 14 percent of companies offer paid paternity leave, and only 13 percent of men take paid paternity leave.
"Nevertheless, a lot of men do manage to take some time off to be with their newborns – they just don't do it officially," says Armin Brott, author of The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year (Abbeville Press, 2003). "Instead, dads cobble together vacation days, sick days [and] personal days or make excuses for why they have to leave the office early."
Regardless of how men are able to take time off to spend more time with their newborns, Brott finds it incredibly important. "Parenting skills are acquired on the job," he says. "There's no evidence that shows women are naturally more nurturing or better at parenting than men. But Dad goes back to work and Mom spends a lot more time with the baby. And the only way she knows what works is because she's done a lot of things that didn't work. The only way Dad is going to feel comfortable and close to his baby is to spend time together, to get used to making mistakes and figuring out on his own what works and what doesn't."
Brott says if a dad can carve out some one-on-one time with the baby – reading, singing, going for walks, changing, bathing, staring at each other – he'll start acquiring parenting skills. "And as he gets positive feedback from his partner and the baby, he'll be more likely to stay involved," he says.
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