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Delivery Room Don'ts
What Not to Do in the Delivery Room
By Mark Cloud
Finally, do not attempt to be the World's Funniest Man by making what you think are amusing comments about medical matters involving the baby. For instance, if your baby boy is yellow and has to be taken to lie under those anti-yellowing lights in the nursery, do not say to your wife, "Maybe we should call him Elton Jaundice." (In the case of a baby girl, do not suggest naming her Olivia Newton Jaundice.)
Of course, you won't have to worry about all the things not to do in the delivery room if you decide to stay in the waiting room until the baby is born. Ultimately, to be or not to be in the delivery room is a decision that each father must make for himself. And the only way to make it is to determine whether 'tis nobler in the mind-numbing waiting room to suffer the slings and arrows of an outraged wife and mother-in-law, or to take arms against a sea of delivery room troubles, and by entering probably offend them anyway.
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