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Dads Flying Solo
How to Come through When Mom Goes Away
By I.J. Schecter
Dads have come a long way in recent years. The modern father can change diapers faster than a pit crew changes tires, spot formula on a store shelf from half a mile away and assemble a toy piano faster than you can say "four C batteries."
But the true test of a modern dad isn't how well he assists Mom – it's how he handles himself when she isn't around. To help you overcome feelings of anxiety or intimidation when Mom's about to head out on a business trip or to see her sister out of town, place yourself in the context you know best: sports. Imagine this: It's late in the game and the score is tied. You're sitting on the bench, adrenaline pumping, when the coach calls your number. It's time to perform.
Here are 5 tips for coming through in the clutch:
As soon as you find out Mom is going away, start observing your kids as though you're a researcher watching them through one-way glass. Study their habits, tendencies and preferences. Learn how Mom cleverly gets them to do certain things and diverts them from doing others. Perform this exercise a number of times so that your responses in a given situation will be not only effective but also automatic. "The most effective thing I do to prepare for a period of solo caregiving is to sit back and watch my wife go through her normal routines with the kids," says Stephen Goldsmith, father of 5-year-old Riley and 3-year-old A.J. "You could read a dozen books and you still won't learn as much as you will from watching your partner over the course of a single day."