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Putting Yourself in Her Shoes
Sympathy-Building Exercises for the Dad-to-be
By I.J. Schecter
Issue
You've heard from friends about the different degrees of morning sickness, from intermittent waves of nausea to a regular morning vomiting routine. You don't see it as a big deal – after all, you've been sick plenty of times.
Sympathy-Building Exercise
Close your eyes. Imagine your testicles being squeezed, just slightly. Take a few strides. Imagine them being squeezed again. Take another few strides. Imagine them being squeezed yet again. Repeat – for three months.
Issue
She wants to buy every book on pregnancy and childrearing that exists. You feel two are more than adequate, since they all seem to say the same thing anyway.
Sympathy-Building Exercise
First, you need to make a genuine effort to understand the responsibility she's feeling. There's a person growing inside her and, your contribution notwithstanding, she feels it's on her shoulders whether or not that person turns out healthy. If you think she's behaving irrationally, consider how many magazines you usually buy in preparation for your fantasy baseball draft.
Second Trimester
Issue
In month 3, she was telling everyone within earshot she was showing, even though it was clear she wasn't. In month 4, she really was showing, and with this came a soaring, mystical feeling. Now it's month 5, and she's complaining that she can't possibly eat as much as the books are telling her she has to. You want to commiserate, but you can't see what's so hard about taking in a few extra calories, especially for your growing child.
Sympathy-Building Exercise
Want to see more?
- Beyond Flowers: Gift-giving Ideas for the New Mom
- Keep Mom-to-be Smiling: 10 Creative Ways to Pamper Your Pregnant Wife
- Going the Full Nine: How to be a Model Husband From the First Day of Pregnancy to the Last
- Emotional Connections: Start the Bonding Process at Day One
- Postpartum Dad Series
- Talk about it!
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