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Postpartum Dad
Playing Problem Police
By Carma Haley
When a snowflake rolls down a mountain, it gains momentum and force. No longer a snowflake, it has become an avalanche. Most people can stop a snowflake, but do you think you could stop an avalanche? The same is true when complications arise after the birth of a new baby. A fussy baby may not be a very big problem, but coupled with making dinner, cleaning the house, caring for an older child or riding a roller coaster of emotions, it can become very overwhelming. What was once just a fussy baby is now a crisis situation. Why not stop the snowflake when it's still a snowflake?
While there are bound to be many small complications during the first few weeks after arriving home with a new baby, there are some difficulties that may seem overwhelming. The three most common complications are postpartum depression, sibling rivalry and the lack of time to be a couple, says Francine Deutsch, professor of psychology at Mount Holyoke College in South Hadley, Mass. and author of Having It All: How Equally Shared Parenting Works. The presence of one of these complications often tends to add stress to an already difficult situation, but Deutsch states that there is no problem that parents can't overcome – together. "It's all about sharing – sharing of the responsibilities, the pressures and the joys of being a parent," Deutsch says. "A parent who acts alone can allow factors such as lack of sleep, tension or even frustration to get in the way and make a small thing something enormous. Parents who work together and compliment each other can help keep things in perspective by reading each other and stepping in when necessary or needed."
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