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Home › Articles › Baby and Toddler › Feeling Something Just Isn't Right

Feeling Something Just Isn't Right

Learning to Trust Your Instincts with Your New Baby

By Kelly Burgess

Pages:  1  2  3  

Dr. Bud Zukow, chairman emeritus of the Department of Pediatrics at Encino/Tarzana Medical Center and author of Baby, An Owner's Manual (Beaufort Books, 2007), agrees that reputable Web sites can help educate parents, but he also says that the advent of the Internet has been, in many ways, a huge headache for pediatricians because there are so many Internet sites that use anecdotes and bad information – but many parents can't tell the difference.

"The biggest change I've seen in medicine in the years I've been a pediatrician has to do with the influence of the Internet," Dr. Zukow says. "I have no problem with parents who are using their own judgment, but often we find it's not the parents' own judgment at all, but rather something they've read by someone who formed an opinion and the parent will put that opinion above medical and scientific fact."

Dr. Zukow thinks parents should never blindly trust a doctor and should not hesitate to get a second opinion. Still, he feels that the key to a good doctor/patient relationship is the practitioner's willingness to take time to talk to and to educate new parents.

"A good pediatrician will offer the time a parent needs to be comfortable and confident with them," Dr. Zukow says. "I look at a child as a person first, and not as a disease. When I get to know that child and that family, that's when I can make the best diagnosis and recommended treatment. If I'm ever not sure I refer them to someone else, but no one is a better first line than a trusted pediatrician."

Trusting Your Instincts from the Beginning

Michelle Branco, a counselor for new mothers in Ontario, Canada, says that a woman should trust her instincts not only when the baby's born, but beforehand as well. At 35 weeks pregnant with her second child, she says she woke up with a feeling of doom. There was nothing specifically wrong beyond a headache, but she couldn't shake the feeling. She finally gave into it and went to the emergency room. The obstetrician dismissed her concerns and she was about to leave when a nurse noticed an unusual heartbeat pattern on the monitor. They rushed Branco across the hall as her son's heartbeat deteriorated. He was born within a few minutes – it was discovered that he had a very long cord that had wrapped itself around his neck four times and a tiny placenta that essentially had stopped functioning.

"My regular OB came in the next day and told me that I had been very lucky as the same circumstances could easily have ended in a stillbirth," Branco says. "Thomas is a thriving little boy with no long-term effects to his dramatic arrival, except that I now know when a mom has a gut feeling about her baby, I had better listen."

Branco passes on these tips to moms who may struggle between their pediatrician's advice and their own best instincts:

  • Practice explaining your specific concerns with a trusted friend.
  • Specific instances with descriptions and duration are very helpful, if applicable. Try to write these down if you can.
  • Consider bringing a support person who is less involved to take notes and remind you of your questions during appointments.
  • Take a non-confrontational "partnership" approach, ensure you understand everything the physician is saying and ask for written materials if you find verbal discussion overwhelming.


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