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Home › Articles › Parenting Strategies › Easy Does It

Easy Does It

Make Family Time a Priority

By Shel Franco

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Keep It Simple

Your good intentions to spend more time together as a family could backfire if you try to structure and plan too much at once. "My husband and I have the best intentions: planning game nights, family outings, etc. but it seems the more planned they are, the more apt they are to fail miserably," Miller says. "Sometimes the coolest things we do (according to the kids) are the more spontaneous things."

Dr. Dawson Church, co-author of Healing Our Planet, Healing Our Selves (APC Books, 2005), tends to agree. "Leave time for the unexpected," he says. "So much of our time is planned, whether it's meals ... or homework and sports after school. The structured nature of these activities favors structured ways of relating. But if you give yourself unstructured time with family members every once in a while, such as a trip to the beach or a walk in the forest, you might find that entirely new conversations may occur."

The best news of all is that this personal goal is bound to be less taxing than most. Play together. Eat together. Laugh together. It doesn't get much easier – or better – than that.

Let's Get Specific!

Wellness lifestyle expert Terra Wellington offers these 3 actions to get you immediate results where family time is concerned:

1. Take a monthly day off: One Saturday a month, plan to not do home improvement projects, cleaning, work or hobbies. Instead, plan a daylong getaway with the family. It doesn't have to be overnight, and it doesn't have to be costly. It can be as simple as taking a drive to a state or regional park to explore, going on a hike together, spending the morning making a yummy breakfast then going to a local park to play and eat lunch. You can visit relatives and friends. Or you can simply make a day out of Blockbuster movies at home, playing Nintendo with the kids and relaxing in the backyard.

2. Respect Sunday: Set aside every Sunday as a rest day. If you are spiritually inclined, go to church together. Whether or not you are spiritual or Bible-based, avoid shopping, eating out, going out with friends and doing home improvement tasks on Sunday. Keep your kids home instead of the in-out friend routine. You will be surprised how family oriented the day will become. Also, by taking the shopping and other mentioned activities out of the Sunday routine, you can really relax and not have a to-do list.

3. Work less: Look for ways to work less, work more at home and work flexibly. If you can do without a dual income household or one full-time and one part-time worker, all the better. Many of today's stresses are caused by both spouses working too much and still having a family to take care of. If you have to downsize your lifestyle to achieve this, look into it. By all means you want to live in a safe neighborhood with access to good schools, but you don't as often need all the square footage and related hefty price tag of the newer home developments. Children need more of your time than your money.


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