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A Father's Emotional Legacy
What Will You Pass Down to Your Children?
By Ann Haarman
You can show your kids that it's OK to express emotions by doing it yourself. "I'm trying to be a little bit more emotionally open with [my son]," Olsen says. "I try to tell him how I'm feeling." As a result, Olsen's son knows that it's OK to have feelings and express them. And Olsen, unlike his father, gets the emotional support he needs from his family. "He'll try to cheer me up by giving me what he considers his favorite toys," Olsen says.
"I try to be very generous with love and praise and encouragement toward my son," Hope says. "I don't think there's anything at all wrong with him having a healthy self-concept and feeling good about himself and his abilities." Hope says he's learned how to be more emotionally healthy from his son, as well. "Of course, to a toddler it comes naturally," he says. "They really wear their hearts on their sleeves."
Just spending time together is the most important way to build a foundation for emotional health in your kids, says Shapiro. It doesn't have to be time spent doing something special, either. It's equally important to spend "just hanging out time, time when you're doing nothing but hanging around the house," Shapiro says. "The nonverbal, the physical and even the short verbal conversations are incredibly powerful for children. Develop your own relationship with your child. Don't try to be a Mr. Mom."
