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Home › Articles › Fatherhood › 21st Century Dads

21st Century Dads

Today's Fathers Are Taking on a Bigger Parenting Role

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Steinberg would like to say it's less stressful now, but it's not – the stress is different. "One of my roles is to make sure that everyone is supposed to be where they are supposed to be when they're supposed to be there, and that can be stressful," he says. "Honestly, when I stopped working full time, our lives slowed down to a normal pace. We are no longer rushing to get things done." His wife can focus more on the kids when she comes home, and the stress has been removed from their marriage. She's also able to pursue things in her career that she couldn't before.

Fortunately, there generally hasn't been much criticism of dads being more active, Shields says. "Cultural norms and expectations have changed so that dads receive less and less backlash everywhere for being involved fathers; as a society we know this is a good thing and we expect dads to be involved, in contrast to past generations who thought a good dad was a good income provider," she says.

Steinberg's daughters have learned that people don't have to be stuck in traditional roles and that parents have to make the best choices for their family based on the circumstance. "My wife and I learned that before our children were born, we should have talked about work, kids, family and how to juggle it all," Steinberg says. "Of course, hindsight is 20/20, and like all parents, we are learning."

Julie Shields has a list of 10 reasons why involved fathers are good for babies and children:

  1. The more a dad visits his newborn in the hospital, the higher the infant's weight gain, and later, the more secure the child becomes.

  2. Children with dads actively involved in the first eight weeks of life manage stress better during their school years.

  3. The more fathers do everyday repetitive tasks such as bathing, feeding, dressing and diapering, the more socially responsive children become.

  4. Children of involved fathers develop more advanced problem-solving skills, more curiosity and more independence.

  5. Children who have a lot of contact with their dads develop better vocal skills.

  6. Children who have a lot of contact with their dads develop better math skills.

  7. Fathers' more physical style of parenting teaches children emotional self-control and how to maintain strong social relationships as adults.

  8. Paternal involvement with young children is the single strongest, parent-related factor in adult empathy.

  9. Fathers who spend time alone with their children more than twice a week, giving baths, meals and basic caretaking, raise the most compassionate adults.

  10. Children of involved dads do better and stay longer in school, have more self-confidence, explore the world more, commit fewer crimes, report higher job satisfaction as adults and support highly engaged fathering as adults.

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