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Finding Financial Harmony in Marriage
A Guide to Being Debt-Free
After You Say "I Do"
After You Say "I Do"
By Heather Johnson Durocher
The key is talking about money – your habits, ideas, plans, wishes – with your spouse. "The No. 1 mistake couples make with money is lack of communication," says McNaughton, who also is the author of Financially Secure: An Easy-to-Follow Money Program for Women (Nelson Books, 2002) and several other finance books and a video series.
It may be easier to let one person worry about the finances, while the other concerns themselves with other things, like running the household, caring for the kids or making the money (and handing over the check). But both spouses must know the family's financial state.
"The one who is in charge [of the money] needs to have a list of everything that's going out and what the due dates are so the other spouse knows," McNaughton says. There needs to be a time at least once a month or every two weeks to sit down and go over it all – even if the person not handling the bills is not interested. If something ever happened to the marriage or a spouse passes away, whoever is not taking care of finances needs to know what bills are out there."
In addition to talking through monthly expenses, experts suggest discussing financial goals and dreams on a regular basis. Update these aspirations by writing them down and reviewing them together at least once a year – an anniversary is always a good time to do this.
While communication is a great place to start, there are several other steps you can take to keep money from becoming an issue in your marriage. They include the following:
- Keep a money journal: Write down every expnditure for 30 to 60 days, McNaughton says. "That's where you're going to see what you're spending," she says. "I don't believe a person can set up a budget until they know where their money is going."
