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Boys Will Be Boys
War Games and Your Son
By Sue Marquette Poremba
For the majority of boys with an interest in the military, both real and pretend, this falls into normal behavior, where adolescents are developing a more sophisticated interest in a subject or hobby. Still, if concern remains about the quality and the quantity of a boy's interest in the military or war games, parents might want to ask themselves the following questions:
- Do they have other interests that they actively pursue (like sports, hobbies, school activities)?
- Do they have healthy friendships and regularly socialize with their peers?
- Do they act out aggressively?
- Do they have trouble telling the difference between fantasy and reality?
- Do they act on impulse and/or have trouble with impulse control?
"Most boys are able to understand the ethical dimensions of war and war games," Gillan says. "It's the ethical dimension that keeps them from taking their interest to a more violent level. But when they begin acting out aggressively, when they have no impulse control, when they are acting out the emotions behind their fantasies, there is a deeper problem that needs investigation."
Next time your son is glued to the news and the latest developments happening in the Middle East, sit down next to him, watch him, listen to him. You might learn something about your child – and about military operations.
