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Workaholics
Penciling Your Family In
By Mary Dixon Weidler
Van Oyen started missing soccer games and dinners. "Then, on nights when I was home, I found the kids had made other plans," he says. "They were used to me being at work."
Unfortunately, the family is deprived of a male role model when Dad is at work too often. This often results in lower self-esteem for the children in the household, who feel they are not important enough to be worthy of their father's attention.
But before you give up hope, remember: The workaholic dad can change. "First, Dad must come to the awareness that his priorities are misplaced. There's more to life than working," says Dr. Drake.
Once that decision is made, it's time to take action. "Dad doesn't have to downshift 'cold turkey,' but can gradually cut back work time as the rewards for doing so become more apparent," says Dr. Drake.
- Spend Some Time With Your Children – Treasuring your children may mean sacrificing other things, but the payoff will be worth it. Remember that parenting is a job, too, and the more time you put into it, the more you and the kids will get out of it.
- Be a Role Model – Would you want your child to be as devoted to his work as you are to yours? Or do you want him to enjoy his home life and feel fulfilled in his role of husband and father? Children learn what they see, so demonstrate to your children what's really important.
- Give Yourself Credit
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