All Tied Up

Unwrapping a Stress-free Holiday Season

By Donna Smith

The responsibilities and demands of life with kids is enough to cause stress, but throw in the hectic schedule most of us follow during the holidays, and stress levels can reach dangerous proportions. The extra responsibilities can make it impossible for some moms to enjoy the season, much less make wonderful memories with their children. But with a little prevention and planning, you can unwrap a stress-free holiday!

Moms usually carry most of the family's stress due to her already full schedule. "When you add on extra shopping, cooking, entertaining, parties, etc., you're bound to suffer from stress," says Karen Susman, a speaker on life balance and the author of 55 Ways To Improve Your Laugh Life: How to Have More Fun at Work and 101 Top Dog Tricks of Time and Activity Management. "Physiologically we can only deal with so many stressors. Even if the holiday is fun and wildly successful, it's stressful nice stress, but your body doesn't know the difference."

Expectations that the holidays must be "picture perfect" can cause stress levels to skyrocket. Making homemade decorations, planning elaborate meals, buying the perfect gifts and hosting the best parties can be fun, but not if you're driving yourself crazy doing it.

Susman says many of us want to recreate or change our own holiday memories. "We have an idealized image of what holidays were when we were kids," she says. "Or, if our holiday time was tarnished as a kid, we've vowed to make a holiday experience for our children that is magical."

Celia Rocks, author of Organizing the Good Life: A Path to Joyful Simplicity, blames technology and access to information that wasn't available before. "There is so much information about what makes a good family, what makes a good holiday, how to do things whether it's wrapping a gift or picking out a turkey that the average person feels completely inadequate," she says. "In addition, we have turned into a society of instant gratification. If we want something, we buy it. If our kids want something, we buy it for them. This makes holiday gift giving especially stressful as we try desperately to find gifts for people who already have everything!"

Rocks also says it has become a status symbol to be overwhelmed and over-committed. "It somehow makes us feel important, but ultimately, it has made us unhappy," she says.

Want to see more?

• Homes for the Holidays: Economical Decorating With Your Family
• Giving Too Much: How to Say "No" Guilt Free
• Seasonal Stress Relievers: How to Relax and Enjoy the Holidays With Your Partner
• Talk about it!