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Are You Listening to Me?
Communicating with Your Teen By Donna Smith
Seta Good ExampleSetting a good example for your child is also important. Why should they listen to you if you do not practice what you preach?
"You can't very well expect your children to listen to any of your advice unless you yourself live it," says Karen*, mother of Jason, 19, and Clayton 13. "Follow the rules if you don't, why would your children? Do you slide through stop signs when driving? Do you ever ask your children to say you are not home for a phone call when you are actually right there? Do you give back the extra change if the cashier makes a mistake or keep silent and keep the money? No one is perfect, but the more we as adults try to practice what we preach, the more apt our children are to listen to us."
What if your child just doesn't want to open up to you? When should you be concerned? When could this be a sign of something more serious?
"Certainly there are quiet, less talkative people, but in a family setting people should be talking," Dr. Jenson. "I would try to re-establish the relationship in a way that there is a lot more interaction and involvement with each other. Don't just let the teen withdraw to another world of friends, school or entertainment."
"Just keep talking and listening," says Peg."Sometimes your child won't have something to say, but one day, [he'll] open up and tell you everything. You just have to be patient and let it come when[he's] ready. And let [him] know you're waiting."
* Last name withheld to protect privacy.
