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The Coed Baby Shower
A Shower for Everyone
By Jessica Williams
A coed baby shower tends to break all of the rules. Instead of a group of women coming together to celebrate motherhood, couples come together to show the new parents they are supported by friends and family. Of course, it is also fun to throw a "dad shower," where his buddies get him gag gifts like Tylenol and ear plugs, but the same "manly" ribbing can be accomplished at a coed shower if the mood is right.
For example, instead of having a more frilly, traditional shower that takes place in a house decorated in pastels and bows, consider having an evening barbecue. The men will have a chance to stand around the grill discussing the mysteries of the last trimester of pregnancy and the anxiety of becoming a father.
Some hosts encounter a little resistance when they invite men to a baby shower. Some men might not be comfortable receiving an invitation to an event that is traditionally held for women. And on the flip side, some women may not think it is right to "spoil" a shower by inviting the guys. But as with any shower, plan according to what the new parents want. Many dads would love to share the spotlight with their pregnant partner.
Unless you plan to throw a surprise shower, discuss what type of shower the couple wants. Do they want to play games? Should it be a pot luck? Would they like to invite a few close friends or the whole neighborhood? Have them write out a guest list and then be prepared to explain to guests why you are throwing a coed shower.
If you are giving invitations by phone, you can easily answer questions from guests who have never attended a coed shower. Your written invitations should specify that the dad-to-be would like to participate and that partners are invited. Address the invitation to both partners as equal guests and consider saying something like, "Peter and Nancy share hopes and goals for their new life as mom and dad. Come honor the couple as we celebrate their impending parenthood."
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