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The House is Quiet

Loving My Niece While Waiting My Turn at Parenthood

By Mark Stackpole

It turned out to be pregnancy, of course, and none of our lives were ever the same. As Lisa grew physically, it was easy to see that she was growing in other ways as well. Her confidence grew and her perspective changed. Her world had become bigger and smaller at the same instant. Bigger in the sense that she was no longer at the center of it, and smaller because nothing else really mattered besides that bundle of cells that was rapidly growing into her daughter. Money problems could be managed and relationship issues resolved, as long as the sun continued to rise on the face of a healthy and happy child.

Over the last five years, my little sister has become my role model. I look to her parenting style – tough, but fair and loving – as I try to formulate my own. Granted, mine is only theoretical at this point, but why not learn from the best? Recently, she has added a husband and a new baby son to the mix. She may no longer need me in the way that she once did, but I need her in a way that I never did before. She is my mentor now and has much to teach me. I am going to milk that for all it is worth.

Want to see more?

• Confessions of the Childless Guy: Learning to Be a Friend to New Parents
• Fuzzy Blue Hippo: A Letter to My Unborn Child
• Keeping the Love Alive When You're Trying to Conceive
• Talk about it!