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Failing Fatherhood
How Men Handle Infertility
By Gwen Morrison
"Men utilize a variety of coping strategies to deal with their infertility," says Dr. Petok. "Often they will overcompensate in the other areas of their lives that enhance their self-esteem and in which they receive lots of attention. For example, men may throw themselves into work, sports or problem-solving activities."
Facing their infertility is the first step for most men. "'Toughing it out' has its limits," says Dr. Keefe. "As the harsh reality of the infertility situation becomes inescapable, men seek support."
Discussion groups, like those at Resolve, offer men an outlet and a place to communicate with other men who are dealing with similar fertility issues. "Some men seek counseling, while others may fear that undergoing counseling signals weakness," says Dr. Keefe.
It is important to note that infertility is a very personal experience. Every man will experience his own individual feelings about his infertility, and each one will find their own unique ways of coping with the emotional aspects of it.
"Some men will bounce back more quickly than others, and some will seem unaffected by infertility," says Dr. Petok. "Regardless, it is important to understand that men's reactions fall within a range. While their coping styles may differ from their female counterparts, men, nevertheless, have much to cope with when they are diagnosed with infertility."
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